Well, the past few days have been more than enough to keep me on my feet, or more accurately, flat on my back. While I have been boasting (sort of) the fact that my body has kept it together since 2009, laying down not one sniffle or sneeze since, the last five immediate days have humbled my health and my record, as I came down with a thing or two that kept me from writing, among all my other regularities.
It feels strange to be out of rhythm, out of my own schedule and timing and agenda. I had many, many things I planned to do, naturally, work-wise and other, having the full weekend off, beautiful weather, ideas to foster. Not so, said my germ-infested system, so amazingly complex yet terrifyingly faulty. Though the thing I want most while sick is to feel the return of my strength, it is profoundly showing, in any moment of weakness, how delicate our humanity can become.
Okay, okay, that being said, I am now much closer to feeling like my normal self, and all the good and bad that comes with that normality. I am up, walking around, eating again (THANK GOD), I can breathe out of both nostrils (sort of), and my temperature is at a blessed and comfortable ninety-eight point six. Possibly with this sudden drop in the weather, even a little lower.
With no huge profundities to reveal, I find that the most I have learned from this five day stint is that the curves never stop, and the reasons to give in to what's wearing on us never run out. I'm not saying I should have been up at my desk, ransacking the sites and putting the finishing touches on my own version of the greatest story ever told. It has a nice romanticism to it, of course, that I could say things like, oh, I had a touch of influenza, but I had no choice but to persevere. Well, sure. Still, in the end, the body knows what it needs, even with the nagging misgivings my brain was apt to feel. But, whatever our plans are, there has to be an ability to bend, to flow, to adapt to the inevitable switches in the system, to go with the changes when they come. To stop, to hurry forward, or in my case, to wait. And rest. And drink a boatload of tea.
As someone who will search for the meaning in everything, from a pageful of poetry to a peanut butter sandwich, I will never cease to uncover the reasons for why things are the way they are, for why we have to learn this or become that. Even if I am only forcing a lesson upon myself, it is that exact sense that both tames and sparks my belief, that speaks to me in lonely quiet, that propels me onward, arms open wide.
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